I.W.A.-Mid South "We're No Joke"
April 1, 2006
Don Preston Recreational Center
Midlothian, Illinois
400+ Fans
With Commentary by Ben Jordan and Jim Fannin

Brain Damage and Deranged vs. Team Underground (Eric Priest and Chandler McClure)

The bulk of the match consists of Team Underground having to out-play and double-team their opponents, since Brain Damage and Deranged are content to absorb punishment and answer back with some big stiffness and slams. McClure gets in a nice Release German Suplex to Brain Damage. The finish comes when Team Underground tries a Spike Piledriver, but McClure jumps off too late. A normal Piledriver will have to do, and it does, giving Team Underground the win at 5:12.

Analysis: The botch really hurt this one. Other than that, it was a good, but formulaic match of "big pain-absorbing guys against athletic young guys". I felt that Team Underground went through a bit of a squash match, even though they picked up the victory. Brain Damage and Deranged have good characters and I liked how they wrestled, while Team Underground didn't impress, though they didn't exactly disappoint. Felt like a standard opener to me. **½

Tag Team Elimination Match To Unify the I.W.A.-Mid South Women's Championship and the NWA-Midwest Women's Championship: Vanessa Kraven and Daizee Haze (N.W.A.-Midwest Women's Champion) vs. Mickie Knuckles (I.W.A.-Mid South Women's Champion) and MsChif

It should be noted that Knuckles proudly brings her I.W.A.-Mid South belt to the ring, while Haze doesn't even bother to bring the N.W.A.-Midwest belt. The atmosphere of a "title unification" match is kinda killed when you've only got one belt to show for it. Maybe Haze pawned her belt for weed. The match starts with all the girls pretty even-matched and stiffing each other. After a few near-falls and assorted coolness, Daizee hits a German Suplex to MsChif, both women's shoulders go down, and both end up getting eliminated. Once it's down to Kraven and Knuckles, both women badly stiff each other, the highlight being a great chop exchange while both are kneeling. MsChif, who hung around outside of the ring following her elimination, spews green mist into Kraven's face, causing Kraven to turn right into the Redneck Hangover (Shining Wizard) from Mickie, so Mickie picks up the win at 6:55. Mickie celebrates post-match, and to her credit, Kraven gets a "Please Come Back" chant as she leaves.

Analysis: Not much of a flow to this one, but I still liked it. Everyone had very good execution, though I thought there was little meaning to their moves besides "use it to use it". Still, I can't help but like a women's match that featured stiffness, neck drops, and big slams. Daizee was a great heel, MsChif was a believable psycho, Mickie was a fantastic brawler, and Vanessa Kraven was an impressive and very effective monster. As mentioned before, having only one belt to show for a "Title Unification" match seems pretty redundant, and kinda killed the atmosphere, but otherwise, this was the first good match of the show. ***

Nine Man Tables, Ladders, and Chairs Elimination Match for an I.W.A.-Mid South Heavyweight Championship Contract: (In Order of Appearance) Marek Brave vs. Tyler Black vs. Trik Davis vs. Billy Roc vs. Dave Crist vs. Chuck Taylor vs. Jake Crist vs. Ricochet vs. Darin Corbin

This'll confuse some at first glance, so let me get the rules out of the way. An envelope with a contract to fight the IWA-Mid South Heavyweight Champion is hanging above the ring. Two men will start out, then every minute after that, another man will enter. Eliminations can occur by pinfall, submissions, or putting someone through a table. Finally, the ladder (both as a means to get the contract and to use as a weapon) could only come into play after all nine have entered the match. With that out of the way…

Black and Brave are first out, and since they're tag partners, they go a bit easy on each other until Trik Davis comes into the match, then they simply double-team him. After some crowd dives, Trik brings a chair into play, leading to lots of stiffness, some occasional sick spots, a large assortment of chair usage, and plenty of brawling. The first elimination occurs when Tyler Black pins Billy Roc with a Cradle Fisherman Buster. Darin Corbin comes out and dances to the delight of…himself…then gets jumped by the seven other remaining guys. Then it's everyone-for-himself, complete with lots and lots of crowd dives, the highlight of which sees Ricochet hit a ****ing insane Double Moonsault off a ladder in-ring to everyone else, who're outside the ring. After that Trik is nearly decapitated from a nasty Doomsday Device. In one of the worst match-killers I've seen, Marek Brave goes up top to hit a Shooting Star Press through a table, which the crowd was begging to see, and botches it, horribly. He collides gut-first with the metal cables that connect the turnbuckle and the ringpost in a gruesome botch, then falls off, right through a table. This, of course, results in Marek Brave eliminating himself. Damn. Double damn. Ricochet is eliminated soon after, Chuck Taylor is eliminated after that, both Crist's are put through a table by Black, and after a Chris Hero run-in to prevent Trik Davis from winning, Darin Corbin ascends the ladder and yanks down the envelope, winning the match at 22:45.

Analysis: This might cause me a bit of controversy, but I've dealt with it before, and I'll deal with it again as long as I get my opinion heard and my point across. This match got downright painful to watch. Half of the match was just a big hodgepodge of cluster-****s, brawling, crowd dives, and neck drops. So, in essence, it was a huge f'ing spotfest. But the thing about that was that if you just enjoyed it as exactly what it was, this match was really getting good, and was getting the crowd way involved. I was really into what I was seeing, but ever since Marek Brave's self-elimination, this one got bad. Not only did the botch cost this match some major points, the crowd was dead following it. They regained some of their rowdiness in the later parts of the match, but you could hear a pin drop for minutes after Brave's self-elimination. Even the wrestlers seemed to realize that after Brave's botch the match had little chance of survival, and they all switched to autopilot. A dead crowd and wrestler's clearly not giving their all isn't my definition of a fun match, and the only thing I could think of in the last few minutes of the match was "just stop. Please, just stop already". This was a big turn-off and prevented me from watching the rest of the show for days after, but some good moments saved it from horribleness. But it's pretty close. **

The Iron Saints (Sal Thomaselli, Vito Thomaselli, and Brandon Thomaselli) vs. "The King of Diamonds" Eddie Kingston, "Sweet and Sour" Larry Sweeney, and Spike Dudley

No Matt Hyson here, everyone's referring to him as Spike, so Spike he shall be called. After some super-stiffness from Sal and Kingston, Eddie gets taken out with a knee crusher onto a chair, and remains motionless and on the floor for the bulk of the match. Spike doesn't fare much better even though he hits the Acid Drop, as he's decked with a chair while the ref is distracted and begins bleeding heavily. Spike even gets punched with Brass Knuckles repeatedly, but eventually gets the hot tag to Sweeney, who cleans house. Eddie eventually comes back in to get a measure of revenge, and manages to hit various suplexes to all three Thomaselli brothers before Vito takes out Eddie's knee with a low dive. The finish comes at 13:20, after Sal hits Spike with the S.A.T. Bomb.

Analysis: A squash, with a story. The Iron Saints dominated Eddie and Spike, but only because of their constant cheating and brutal tactics. The whole story of Eddie's hatred and the Saint's ruthlessness was played off expertly with Eddie trying his best to come back after basically being taken-out, while the Saints looked to be having the time of their lives as they ruthlessly assaulted Kingston and badly (and I do mean badly) bloodied-up Spike Dudley. Sweeney was a powerhouse and made all the difference, but in the end, the story of the match was that you can't take on The Iron Saints with two badly injured partners. Although the only real psychology in the match was "brawl and cheat to win", this one was still pretty enjoyable, but can't reach a good-like rating because of its squash-like nature. **¾

Ruckus vs. Josh Abercrombie

After a bit of chain wrestling, both men fight into the crowd with Ruckus mostly dominating, even doing some wall-walks and a double cartwheel splash. After a Moonsault Legdrop by Ruckus gets 2½, Abercrombie gains control of the match by working over Ruckus's back. There's a couple near-falls until Ruckus hits a sick Gory Special into a rolling Complete Shot. Even so, Josh takes the match at 11:50 following a Lungblower and a Phoenix Splash.

Analysis: This one felt really redundant to me. Did we need another spotfest? I honestly don't think so. Aside from a few blown spots, both men gave a generally decent effort. I'm usually fine with Ruckus, even a casual fan, and I instantly liked Josh Abercrombie based on his ability to get instant heat and the fluidity of just about all of his moves, but I just wasn't feeling the love on this one- it flat-out bored me. It wasn't exactly bad, though, it just felt too average at times and "only alright" at others. Either way, it'll have to do. **½

Kevin Steen vs. Ian Rotten

Before the match, Kevin Steen cuts a hilarious promo about this match being I.W.A.'s version of Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon, since Ian is I.W.A.'s promoter. Following some chain wrestling, both men Flair Strut and chop each other. Ian lets loose on Steen with some assorted hard shots, and the two brawl and stiff each other outside the ring. After getting his face rocked with a dropkick into a corner by Ian, Steen hits his Somersault Legdrop, and then nails a top-rope flying elbow. Following a close call where Ian nearly gets pinned by a superkick, Steen goes up top and tries for a somersault senton, only to bounce off both of Ian's knees. Rotten gets in a quick La Magistral hold to pin Steen, winning it at 11:58.

Analysis: A good 'lil match that felt both parts intense and comedic. The basic story is that Steen is Steen, but he's trying too hard to show off and goof around, and while Ian can be a goof sometimes, in his matches he's a glutton for punishment and nearly masochistic, so nothing Steen threw at him had any gradual effect. And, of course, Steen underestimated Ian's skill as a non-deathmatch wrestler. The stiffness was stiff, the spots were nice, the comedy was comedic, and the match was good. ***

Delirious vs. "The Generic One" El Generico

Both men go through some very funny segments, stuff I'd rather not spoil. Suffice to say, the potential comedy you would think of for a Delirious/Generico match is more than delivered. Once both men start the match proper, it's basically some stiff shots and signature moves. There's a couple finisher teases, some near-falls, etc. Delirious gets caught and badly face-scraped with a Running Yakuza Kick, but beats Generico at 15:50 with the Chemical Imbalance #2.

Analysis: Another quality match, with lots and lots of great comedy moments. After both men had gone through some hilarious comedy spots, the actual wrestling displayed by both was still good. They were a bit basic, though- not as diverse as I would have liked, and not as diverse as I knew they could be. But even with a relaxed moveset both men impressed, and while the match may have not been as stellar as I thought it could be, it was still high-quality, and the hilarity more than delivered what I hoped it would. ***¼

"Mr. Insanity" Toby Klien vs. Tank

After both men forearm each other, the match leads outside, and both go super-stiff with some nasty, nasty headbutts that legitimately bust both of them open. After more stiffness and headbutts, Klien hits a big above-ropes crowd dive onto Tank, then gets in a gruesome chairshot, which busts Tank wide open. Klein then dismantles Tank with a corner-to-corner dropkick into a chair, further increasing Tank's bloodletting. To make matters worse, Tank than has to endure shoot-like punches right to his bleeding skull by Klein. Toby wins the match at 9:59 with a 180° Splash. Post-match, both men bang knuckles to show mutual respect.

Analysis: This one ended a bit too soon for me, as I felt the finish was decently done, but still felt anti-climatic. To be honest, both men were so good at beating the crap out of each other; I wanted to see them do more of it. Suffice to say, this one was getting really, really good for what it was. In terms of actual wrestling, this epitomized "garbage" style, but as two crazy mofo's wanting to brutalize the hell out of each other, this was a highly-enjoyable match. The "hardcore brawl" appeal was definitely there, and the constant stiffness felt like it had meaning- more as a part of both men's characters then to get a cheap pop from the crowd. The story was as simple as two badasses wanting to prove who was tougher, but it was played well. Not many detractors on this one and my biggest critique was that brevity is the only thing that prevented this from being one of the selling-points of the show. ***

Necro Butcher vs. Low Ki

Where to begin with this one. Ki sneaks in through the crowd and blindsides Necro, and the fan's throw in an insane amount of streamers, mainly for the hell of it. The crazy visual of Ki and Necro brawling in a sea of black and yellow streamers is something I won't soon forget. Within seconds, the match is in shoot-fight levels of stiffness, and the brutality only gets far worse. Both men brawl almost everywhere in the crowd, and Ki lets out some kicks that almost knock out Butcher. After more of the same shoot-like level of hard shots, Low Ki looks to be dominating Necro, but can't manage to put him away. After a vicious Standing Double Stomp by Ki gets 2¾, he's nailed with a big, decisive lariat that catches him right between the eyes. Then Necro punches Ki so hard he goes outside of the ring. Necro doesn't let up, and throws a chair into Ki's face multiple times. Ki comes back with an insane Ghetto Stomp to Necro's back, but only gets 2¾. In the highlight of the match, the show, and probably one of the highlights of the entire year, Ki does the Corner Ghetto Stomp to Necro…through a table. Ho-lee ****ing hell. That was brutal. Necro manages to kick out of that, unbelievably, but gets choked out with a Dragon Sleeper at 22:06.

Analysis: Super-sweet. Loved this match. One hell of a brawl, filled with emotion, intensity, and all-out hatred. Both men wanted to stop the match on a Knock Out and nothing else, and that's ultimately exactly what happened. Ki's defiance and disrespect of Necro was a huge selling point, as was Necro forcing himself to continue since he viewed himself as the "symbol" of I.W.A. Mid-South. Without a doubt, Necro's resiliency made the match special, as did Ki's superb character development. Unlike some traditional "no respect for you" heels, Ki never had that moment where a soft spot grew in his heart; he never reached the point where he said "Damn, if Necro can take this much punishment and still want more, maybe he and I.W.A. deserve my respect after all". That never happened. Ki was simply too badass to give a **** about Necro not backing down: if Necro wouldn't quit, he'd just hit him harder. That, and many other things, made the match all the more compelling, exciting, and balls-out awesome. This one lived up to its hype and a whole lot more. ***¾

Chris Hero vs. Milano Collection A.T.

Milano mostly outsmarts Hero in the early going, and Hero has to fake an injury before he can get an advantage over Milano, but Chris gets one decisively, with a nasty German Suplex. Both men begin the hard shots, and go back-and-forth repeatedly, getting more and more aggressive each time. After a ref bump, Milano gets a verbal tapout on Hero, but has to break the hold to get the referee back into play. Hero turns the tides for a while with a low blow, but ends up tasting the Armani Shoe Exchange for a count of 2¾. Even though Milano manages to get in an A.T. Lock, he ends up tapping to a Torture Boston Crab, and Hero wins it at 23:55.

Analysis: A good way to end the show, but a bit underwhelming for me. Like Delirious/Generico, this was still a pretty good match, but I just felt it didn't measure up to its full potential. Then again, I liked how it combined a heated atmosphere, good technical wrestling, lots of emotion and passion, and some very fluid segments with general know-how and good spots. Both men were very entertaining, and wrestled each other very well. I just felt that both men could've mixed it up a bit better: Hero's cheating was so base and standard that I knew he could do better, while Milano could've put on a better showcase of his talents aside from some good chain wrestling skills, looking really angry when Hero kept cheating, and doing some signature moves. Bearing all that in mind, credit will be given where it is justly deserved: this was one of the better matches of the show, and definitely deserves a watching. Though I may seem a bit negative, I actually enjoyed this one a lot. ***¼

Final Thoughts: As an introductory to I.W.A.-Mid South, this one honestly didn't make me an instant fan the way that "All Star Weekend Night 1" did for P.W.G., "Supercard of Honor" did for R.O.H., "Navigate for Evolution '05" did for NOAH and Puroresu in general, etc. The plain fact is that I just didn't like some of the matches on this show. That's not to say that they were crap (one was close), but I just felt that a few of the matches were lacking. I liked the show's atmosphere, though: the crowd could get really involved and add to a match, while the lighting (even for an afternoon show) was particularly top-notch, with nothing ever seeming too dark or bright. The camera angles and video quality are also as well-done as Smart Mark can do.

It's the show itself that has a few bumps in the road. The opener was standard, so it didn't affect me at all, neither positively or negatively. The Tag Team Women's Match was a treat, and I enjoyed just about all of it. But from the 9-Man T.L.C. to the start of Ian/Steen, I almost forced myself through watching parts of this show. The T.L.C. was a big letdown, as I've already described, and two matches following that didn't exactly help. Even though I thought the Six-Man Tag and Abercrombie/Ruckus were decent, even enjoyable, it took Ian/Steen to restore my interest in this show.

But after that, though, this show was stacked with some killer ****. From the 6th match to the end, the show had that genuine "something for everybody" feel that produces big recommendations. Hero/Milano was good from a technical point, while Ian/Steen and Tank/Klein had various levels of brawling goodness. The biggest and best match of the entire show was Ki/Necro, and will probably be the main reason someone buys "We're No Joke". It definitely was for me, and as a show-seller, this match will more than make up for any of the show's other faults.

So while I'm not as impressed as I thought I would be, this is still a great show, and deserves a pretty good recommendation. Get it for Ki/Necro and Milano/Hero, dislike it for some filler and a few less-than-stellar matches, but love it for what it is and you won't be disappointed in the least bit.

Overall Rating for I.W.A.-Mid South "We're No Joke": ***¼